When stars appeared
overhead I went back to my room and slept for twelve straight hours. I woke
with my mind sharp and bright and clear and sold nearly the entirety of my
possessions, keeping only the costly hardware and software and wetwear I’d
accumulated through my career. I bought a small folding knife and cut my hair.
At sunset I walked down to one of the piers and threw my ID card in the ocean.
I laughed at myself for
that. The Profusion wasn’t going to drag me back to manage information flow. Its administrators didn’t even know my name; ID cards were blank
except for a department seal and a slim magnetic strip. To them, I was a unique sequence of four different letters, and signed every
time I swiped my finger to purchase something.
I looked at my hand in
silhouette against the setting sun. My body, bones and skin
and curving flesh. Nerve and muscle and finest hair. I was here, I lived. Else
I would
miss the supple muscled motion of my fingers.
I took out the
knife I had used to cut my hair. And drew it across my fingertip, just enough
to draw a little blood. Your name was verbal, vocal, the sounds your
mother called you.
Crimson pooled minutely on my
fingertip. That was one of the elder faiths, I thought. Drink my blood to
remember me. Such had been the lapsed devotion of a boyfriend long gone. But people remembered laughter,
touch, lakes and sex and wind and food on languid mornings. The smell of a
husband’s hair, an infant’s smile, hot rivulets of tears. Crimson-splashed
rushes to the hospital, the pallid face of illness. Frantic embraces in the
night.
A magsled slid past, the flying silver bullet of its hull
bearing some soldier on patrol. I started at the sound of its engine. The pool
of blood fell from my fingertip, trickling to the sand.
Soldiers, I thought, wore bands around their arms, with
little machines inside. The nanites remembered everything a guardian did and
thought and felt. The military read them after an incident: the Profusion
policing its police. Officers reviewed the information by linking bracelets or ingesting
the machines the soldier’s blood once carried.
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